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HP7 Spoils - meanwhile by agent57 HP7 Spoils - meanwhile by agent57
(I hope I submit this right, I really never could figure out the new thumbnail system... or lack thereof. SIGH. I give up. Also I hope my writing is legible. Also I totally forgot how to draw robes.)

So yeah, Deathly Hallows spoilers. I just finished it last night, and this was one of the first things that came to mind. My alternate version of an epilogue.









Monty Python-ishness. "It's only a flesh wound."

It's kind of dumb, I know. I don't really protest Snape's death... not like, say, Lupin's and Tonks'. (Which seemed unnecessary, especially in light of Harry chewing out Lupin earlier for risking his life and not thinking of the bay-bay. I mean couldn't at least one of them have survived? You and your orphans, JK...) In fact I think there was some powerful imagery there. Still, I'm not sure it was inevitable, and I kind of wish he had a chance to kick some ass beforehand. Literal ass, not just the general ass-kicking he does.

I hate to be all Snape groupie like everyone and their mother, but during that break from HP I kind of forgot how awesome he is. Let's face it, he's pretty awesome.

Edit Trying, once again, to get a preview working. I think... yes... success! Click download to view.
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:iconlittleshadow3:
littleshadow3 Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2013  Student Artist
HE'S ALIVE!!!
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:iconphoenix-12:
Phoenix-12 Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2013
Featured here: [link] :)
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:iconrandommumble:
RandomMumble Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol Just went through my favourites and came across this again. Still awesome! =D
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:icongryffgirl:
Gryffgirl Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2012
I love it! Yes, I agree, it would have been great to see him do some ass kicking before he checked out! ;)
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:iconfabiolacapo:
FabiolaCapo Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2011
This is fantastic! xD
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:iconrandommumble:
RandomMumble Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
:rofl: +totally agrees+
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:iconseverly-snapped:
severly-snapped Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2011  Professional Filmographer
Nice. Reminds be a little of Mustafa in the Austin Powers series. Funny stuff. Nice job! ;)
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:iconikaika-puuwai:
ikaika-puuwai Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2011
Yeah, he is!
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:iconlibusgrace:
LibusGrace Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2011
awww & LOL all wrapped into one picture.

I so wish he would have lived.
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:iconlady-soujiro:
lady-soujiro Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2011
poor sevy! :P
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:iconjanach:
janach Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Snape had to die because he's an operatic hero and that's what they do, but I would have loved to see him go wand-to-wand against the Dark Lord. With the entire remaining cast watching, of course, and doing some major damage to old Snake-face before he's taken down.

Killing Tonks and Lupin just so Teddy could be an orphan was a tacky move, I think, but I can't say I regret their loss. To me they were characters who should have been interesting but somehow never were. My own opinion, naturally.
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:iconjennyraepip:
jennyraepip Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
"Tis but a scratch!"

I too think Lupin & Tonk's death were unnecessary. It makes me sad that they didn't have much of a battle to the finish. It was like... So Fred died, so sad! Everyone's depressed.... btw, Lupin and Tonks = Dead. Now, lets move on!

And absolutely! Snape is awesome. His character was beautifully done, and I love how JK wrote him. He's evil, brutal, nasty and sharp, but at the same time he's lovable. Can't deny that.

I love this alternative ending. It's one of those, after-the-credits moments, that would be added right at the back of the book or end of a film.
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:iconcherryblossomsx:
CherryBlossomsX Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011
He's probably still there. Waiting. After all this time. DAMNIT POTTER, 50 POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR FOR IGNORING A PROFESSOR IN NEED.
/cries
"Tis a scratch!""A scratch? Your arm's off!"
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:iconneala-ernswa:
Neala-Ernswa Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
YOU SEE IT TOO.

I keep hateing Potter, and Granger for not useing some of their Healing Potions to save him! tHey had some good ones! They could have tottaly saved him!

Fucking idiot Potter and his stuiped...face....
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:iconjennyraepip:
jennyraepip Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I agree, 100%.

Potter is supposed to be one of the greatest wizards. Shame he couldn't have used his magic to save Snape and fix his eye sight.
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:iconjanach:
janach Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Nothing in canon says Harry is one of the greatest of wizards. He has his talents, but he's a classic example of the "Average Guy as Hero." This is a hard trope to pull off because readers keep wanting him to be super-powerful, but the whole point is that he's not extraordinary. He's ordinary like the reader is ordinary, but he's required to be a hero and somehow he manages to be one. That implies that we ordinary readers could be heroic too, if it were necessary. That connection is spoiled if Harry is a great wizard in a league with Dumbledore.
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:iconjennyraepip:
jennyraepip Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah that's a good point. It's nice to see Harry as the average guy hero! I still like to assume that he has immeasurable talents, but I don't know why. I do admit that it's better to see Harry is average. I will have to remember to keep that in mind when I read the books again :)
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:iconneala-ernswa:
Neala-Ernswa Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Right?!

You can re grow all the bones in his arm but you can't fix his eyes?
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:iconjennyraepip:
jennyraepip Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Haha! Absolutely. I mean, he's probably just got a lazy eye. Us muggles can get laser eye surgery, and we're fixed. They have magic, and can't do anything. *sigh*
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:iconneala-ernswa:
Neala-Ernswa Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Maybe they can, but Harry was like "No way- I'm into this whole hyster look."
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:iconjennyraepip:
jennyraepip Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Haha! That's definitely it. Harry's such a rebel XD
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:iconneala-ernswa:
Neala-Ernswa Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
lol!
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:iconcap-a-pie:
Cap-a-Pie Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is funny:D

It would be sad if they DID just leave him like that....:|
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:iconphantomprincess123:
PhantomPrincess123 Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2009
haha 8D
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:iconcolesavage:
colesavage Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2008
lol
Thats exactly what i was thinking.
Hermoine had no problem getting jars, but poofing up a band-aid was out of her skill level.
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:icondrzoidspock:
DrZoidSpock Featured By Owner May 27, 2008
*ROFLOL*
:+fav:'s.
That is hilarious.
Reply
:iconchibimomiji123:
ChibiMomiji123 Featured By Owner May 9, 2008  Student Traditional Artist
xDD THAT. WAS. AMAZING.

*laughs* Man that brightened my day.
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:iconredelf:
redelf Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2007   Traditional Artist
Is the mother of the snape crazed fan group.
Reply
:iconenigmaticss:
EnigmaticSS Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2007
Yes, he is way too awesome! :w00t: You can't deny his story is special and touching. I'm gonna miss him. :tears:
Nice fanart by the way!
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:iconungapants:
Ungapants Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2007  Professional Digital Artist
I like the way you drew this pic. I like the stoney texture and the blood :D. I read it like the guy from Austin Powers, who goes... "I'M STILL ALIVE...BUT I THINK I'VE BROKEN MY NECK..BUT IM OK..." funny stuff
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:iconsheana:
Sheana Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2007
He's not dead, he's only resting! Pining for the fjords of Spinner's End. Or something.

It wasn't a bad death, and he was honored well after (and kinda lives on forever in that portrait!), but I don't think it was really inevitable either. I was hoping he'd make it out, battle-scarred but still kickin', hanging around to snark at future generations of students and passively-aggressively hating Harry. Alas.

Ah well, just give it time and the fangirls will come up with outrageous fan-fictions explaining how he's not dead or just plain resurrecting him in some crazy fashion!
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2007  Professional General Artist
Give it time? I'm pretty sure it's already out there. Their fan-senses were probably tingling before the book came out, and they found themselves resurrecting him in fanfic without even knowing why... :D
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:iconsheana:
Sheana Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2007
Hah, probably!

My personal fanfic idea.

NEO-DEATHEATERS: Using the piece of soul in this portrait and some ancient arcane spell we found, let's resurrect Snape to do our bidding! ...aaaand Resurrect!
SNAPE: What.
NEO-DEATHEATERS: You are raised by our hand, and now we command you to follow us and bring glory to the name again!
SNAPE: To hell with that. *Apparates to Hawaii*
NEO-DEATHEATERS: ...Crap.

And he was never heard from again, not by young Potters or Weasleys, not by Hermion Granger or any other pairings, not even by Mary Sues. THE END.
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:iconjanach:
janach Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
There is a story called "Flotsam" on ff.net that has Snape doing that very thing, though Hermione does accidentally Apparate into the ocean in front of his beach house and ends up having to be rescued. Gryffindors are so annoying!
Reply
:iconjessica-in-iowa:
Jessica-in-Iowa Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2007  Professional Photographer
LOve this idea, only because this sounds like Snape, and well its funny...
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2007  Professional General Artist
Excellent! I wish him many fruity mixed drinks. :D
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:iconhokuto:
hokuto Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007
Snape's made of snark and awesome. D: *gives him blood transfusion*
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:iconastellus:
Astellus Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007
I was a Snape groupie long before people thought it was cool *jokes* I hear ya..don't understand why they didn't try to heal him when they were standing there watching him die and whatnot...well yeah, I do, but yanno, I'm gonna stop talking now!
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:iconyamichi:
YamiChi Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007
Glad someone else agree's that Lupin and Tonks clearly only died so there was another orphan.

Amusing image, and yea I'm not a rabid Snape fangirl but his death in the end was quite sad. I wish to see more Monty Potter type images!
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007  Professional General Artist
Yeah, man! And it was like... she created the orphan and then Harry doesn't even really do much in the way of looking after him! (it seemed)
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:iconactifblue:
actifblue Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2007
I do love this panel. If only right? haha

I know this is kinda weak but. . . J.K. really wanted to kill off one of the parents in the books. It didn't have to be both, but at first she decided to kill off Arthur Weasley. And I don't know where you stand with him, but in book five I was hanging off the edge of my seat when Nagini attacked him. Just before book 7 came out I declared to several people that if she killed off Arthur I'd throw the book across the room and not pick it up again for months(days. . .hours. . minutes. . .). So, you know where I stand.
Now, Lupin was the last of the Marauders to die (they all went in backwards order: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs). I think he had to go. He was one of my favorite characters, but in the end really what kind of life did he have? Re-reading the books, it sounds like a depressing one. . ..
As for Tonks, well honestly, she's not a great character. I don't think she was very developed and thus kind of expendable. When you read book six, she's almost nothing without Lupin. And that's pretty lame. I think Arthur is a more worthwhile character to keep around.
As for the kid? He had a family member who could take care of him and love him in a way that the Dursleys never loved Harry. His story is tragic, but not all orphans are mistreated. And not all muggles are magic haters. . . I think she rounded it out quite well there. Although, there are some things I'd revise in the epilogue. . . but that's me. (Albus Severus is annoying. . . what about James... but she forgets Sirius? I mean really lets honor the five people who died for Harry)
Oh and I absolutely love Snape, never thought he was bad for a minute. It was sad when he died. :-( that was one of her best side stories.
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2007  Professional General Artist
Of course I am glad Arthur didn't die, but I have a whole big list of greivances against the Lupin/Tonks deaths. So... read at your own risk.

My big beef with it is that it had to be an either-or scenario. She decided she had to kill one of the parents to up the risks or whatever. So. okay, mildly annoying to me... but she didn't bother to make it a meaningful death, so it seemed pointless. Now I can accept the "all the maurauders must die" excuse, really, but giving Lupin such a kind of nothing death (happened off-screen, bearely even mentioned) made me mad. And killing Tonks when she had no reason to die, and didn't even get a ghosty epilogue... also annoyed me. And gave me the feeling that JK made Teddy into an orphan just because oh she looooves them orphans.

And think of Andromeda... she lost her husband and daughter. That family was reduced by two thirds! Besides, what makes trading one death for two fair? I'm not arguing that Tonks was a strong character in the books, but I liked her and I thought she had potential. Her being expendable makes her death seem so much more pointless. She didn't really do anything, so what was the point in killing her off? If she was expendable because JK wrote her to be expendable, then that sucks.

BUT what really, really annoys me about Lupin's death is that in the first half of the book, Harry tells him off for trying to risk his life and not look after the baby! So, how is it better for Lupin to run off and leave his son in the big final battle than it would have been for him to hang out with the trio in the woods for a while and risk his life that way. Really, he would have been safer! She made the point of parents-should-be-around-for-their-kids and then just ignored the point she had made and killed Lupin off. And you can say "well that's how life is, people die for no good reason" but this is literature! I want good reasons and meaningful deaths!

In my heart they're both still alive, but I would be fine with it if Tonks had survived and Lupin had been given an even semi-meaningful death that was consistant with earlier themes. I didn't see the need for them both to die, and certainly not in the way they did. If it was just so Arthur could live... well, then, Lupin should have died saving Arthur's life. I'm only judging by what was in the book, not by what she says her other options were.

(I admit I teared up at the "Albus Severus" thing, just cause I was so looking for some Snape-rememberance... but it was annoying and just plain confusing to have all those characters named after other characters.)
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:iconactifblue:
actifblue Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2007
Okay then, I misinterpreted the meaning. Yeah it did TOTALLY suck when Harry walked into the Great Hall and it was like "oops Lupin and Tonks are dead." I had to read that one about six times before it sunk in. However, Lupin in the forest with the trio would have been a huge liability as he is a werewolf, and wolfsbane potion blah blah blah. I think there were some things that we quite rushed in the book, I think she could have rounded it out a bit better. Sometimes I wonder if the publishers pushed her to move too quickly. I get a somewhat unfinished feeling from it. Yeah and you're right, how does Wormtail get a more meaningful and important death than Lupin?
I think the only theme that this follows is that Voldemort destroys families. He destroys love, senselessly. Lily and James didn't really have to die, Neville's parents didn't need to be tortured to insanity. But a lame death, is a lame death and Lupin(one of her favorite characters no less) deserved better than that, you're right.
(Arthur is worth two to me, by the way :) he collects plugs for gods sake! hahaha)
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:iconyamichi:
YamiChi Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007
That's true, he kinda became the 'forgotten' orphan
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:icontanken:
Tanken Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2007
Yeah, that bothered me too. What happened to Hermione's "lol-instant-heal-potion" that she used on Ron's shoulder?

Also I love the picture :3 I lol'd.
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007  Professional General Artist
Thanks!
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:iconpoaet:
Poaet Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2007  Professional Photographer
omg... LOL. Flesh wound... monty python...
I guess Rowling was trying to imply that Nagini (snake's name I think) took a HUNK out of Snape's neck...
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2007  Professional General Artist
Yeah, that plus probably venom. Generally pretty fatal. I just like being a jerk. :D

(For the record I'm not saying this was a possibility, I'm just saying on further inspection, his death didn't really serve many purposes that couldn't have been served in a different way. I guess? He was killed so Voldy could have power over the wand, but then it turned out the wand was never under Snape's control, so his death was kind of pointless in that sense. In which case I guess he died so he could be a tragic hero... but he didn't really get a heroic death. A stunning death, maybe... but... he didn't even get a chance to fight. ;_;)

(*cough* but I'll stop blabbing away to your comment. Sorry. >_> Thanks for stopping by!)
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:iconprecosiouschild:
PrecosiousChild Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007  Professional Filmographer
Yeah, where's Fawkes when you REALLY need him :D

Poor Snape, he's all like: Uhm anyone? Hellooo?
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:iconagent57:
agent57 Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2007  Professional General Artist
Haha, yes... Fawkes flew off before most of the dying started happening. Phoenixes are jerks!
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